Lessons Learned from The Taking of Pelham 123:Lesson #1: You can tell how bad a character is by the amount of times he says "motherfucker" in a sentence.
Lesson #2: If you break the law, but do it for your family, and then save some people's lives, even though some other people died -- the Mayor of New York City won't send you to jail.
Lesson #3: Crooked Wall Street guys are smart enough to hijack a New York City subway train and extort 10 million bucks from the Federal Reserve, but aren't smart enough not to reveal their identities by telling the train dispatcher -- ie., everyone else as well -- stories specific to their lives.
Lesson #4: John Travolta does not look Italian. Apparently. That's why it's not weird when he consistently insults John Turturro with anti-Italian slurs like "greaseball".
Lesson #5: People still say "greaseball".
Lesson #6: Spending time in prison for white collar crimes can turn you into a ruthless murderer with a neck tattoo.
Lesson #7: Brian Helgeland still can't write. I'm blaming him for Travolta's inconsistent, stupid character.
Lesson #8: Flash cuts and pauses don't increase tension.
Lesson #9: The older, the better. The changes in this version from the original are stupid. Transit cop Lt. Zachary Garber was a much more interesting character than this film's Walter Garber (although I do enjoy the shout-out to Walter Matthau there who played Garber in the original). And the conceit in that film was better. This was all yelling and Travolta overacting, the original was a mystery, something had to be solved. Less chase bang chase, more... brains.
Lesson #10: Stop watching remakes. They are killing your brain cells.
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